So since I can’t seem to keep an update at least once a week it looks like I have a lot of talking writing to do. Well first off, NOAH IS WALKING!! All over the place. Into everything! He is so freaking adorable. Thanks to Jeanine Amato for helping him every week since he was 6 mths old! He has come so far and I am so so proud of him. I tell you what HE makes my world go round. That happy little face brightens my heart J. He is talking so much. It’s hard to understand sometimes but I understand most of his cute little sentences. I love the start of this new “Noah”. I love being able to hold mini conversations with him. It makes every day worth waking up to. His little voice is the best sound ever. I am completely in love with this mini version of me. HE is the best thing ever! He does so well feeding himself too. It’s been 3 years and I can’t put into words how amazed I am and how much I have learned from being his mother. Thank God for him, my little blessing. I completely adore every little speck of hair to his tiny crooked toes. He is mine. He has learned how to say “I love you” and hearing him say that makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. He couldn’t be any more perfect.
Okay okay. . .enough of that already, huh? No never enough. Lol! Work is still the same. I am looking for something better. Something that better suits me. School is going. I have dropped from full-time to part-time. It was just that “middle”. I didn’t want to just quit and take another break already. I need this. I need to push myself to do it and do it well. I was failing all my classes. I am back on track though. Third time taking this class and I have straight A’s. Back to myself again. I got a little off track.
Still living in the same little white house. It’s adorable. I love almost everything about it. The wooden floors, the happy and quiet neighbors, and the chirping sound of the birds in the morning. . .oh how I just love it. I love having a yard. It is very hard to keep up though. I wanted to buy a house. I think that will wait. . .until I marry. Whenever that will be. Who fricken knows! BOOOO!!
Now that I am on that subject. . . .I never thought love at first sight was real. Well it is. I’m getting over it. I keep thinking about how stupid I sound and look when I tell you I fell head over heels inlove with this guy I knew for 2 days. I didn’t think it was possible but it is. I don’t even know this guy. I met him through a friend at a bar. He took me home, we hung out that weekend and I fell. I fell hard. I made myself look like an ass. Excuse the language. It’s done, it’s over with. I can’t even tell you why or how I am so inlove with this adorable cowboy. . .he is just a man. A broken hearted man. All I know is its over just like that. He is gone and I have to move on. That’s my only option. I keep telling myself that there is a guy out there for me. He will love me unconditionally one day. One day. Guys tell me all the time that I would make an amazing girlfriend and that I have everything going for me BUT those guys. . .they are taken. Why must all the good ones be taken? I don’t get it. I am so amazing but I am alone. I hate coming home to an empty house every day. I do it all alone. I have no companion. Just a friend. . .and that isn’t going anywhere. I don’t want it to go anywhere. He is everything I don’t want. So I am trying my hardest to patiently wait. I just don’t know how long I can wait. . . .is this going to take forever? I guess God is def teaching me patience. I refuse to settle anymore. I have done that way to many times. I need a good man, with a steady and dependable job, with a college degree and his crap together, and someone that knows how to treat a woman and doesn’t mind stepping up and taking the place of a father for my son.
So here I am just waiting. . .
I miss my family. As always. I have figured it out though. I can’t see myself ever moving from the beach area. This is home to me. I never want to leave the beach. There is just something I feel when I am close to it. I feel happy. There is this sense of magical feeling. . . .I can’t say exactly but I know I am truly happy there and I can never leave. This is home. No other place feels the way it does. I will miss my family. I will miss my friends. They will have to come visit. Or I will visit.
Speaking of friends I miss them too! Jami! Shanna! And. . .Zach! my besties! I love them all so much and wish we all lived on one street so I could see them as much as I wanted. I can’t live without speaking to these people often.
Ok so now that I have written a book I have to go get my beauty rest. . .
